Considering what we're dealing with, chances are that guy's mind works in ways that're probably impossible for us to understand. Mostly, anyway. [ Well, that's his general opinion. ] Not that I know too much about Gods and religion, but I can't find it in me to respect anyone who hates something as perfectly natural as a good desire.
[ Pointed nails drum on the countertop. ]
You think so? Contracts are rigid in my line of work...but I don't remember agreeing to this one, personally. I hate to admit that gets under my skin a little, and not in the fun way.
Maybe you'd know how that feels better than I would. Everything about this feels off to me, so I couldn't pinpoint which or where.
[ Something twitches and pulls at the corner of his mind, lips pursing tight. God, huh.... ]
I don't really like making them, usually. I'm not too fond of the work I do, so they're usually distasteful. Me and the family business don't really mesh well....at least on the moral code side of things, y'know?
[ Maybe not, but considering most of Yugamu's God Knowledge is from shoddy old books back in the satellite and from the invaders, it's still probably better than him. ]
Assassination, actually. [ You know, said as casually as if he was into computer science or something. ] Contracts are pretty much the whole business.
[He blinks at that. But there's nothing anxious or worried in his face at the sound of that. In fact, it almost seems like he's hearing something familiar.]
I see. But you said something about...going against the family?
[ Well, that's..a new reaction. Probably the most mild he's ever gotten, actually. ]
Right, that....taking lives for money is just vulgar, you know? Murder should be intimate and passionate, full of love and joy. Makes me not exactly perfect killing machine material.
[ The gaze shifts, an unreadable look in his eyes, although his lips twinge in bitterness. ]
...Which is why this place is pretty disgusting to me. The meaning loses it's weight when you push someone to kill for greed and desperation.
I've never heard murder described that way. [He's talking about it like he's talking about the weather.] So you feel it should be a special experience...?
That's true. Those are all tragic in their own right, since nature doesn't really discriminate. But isn't the fact it's fragile beautiful in it's own way?
[ Soft, and easy-breakable. And yet people persevere all the same, something to be admired. ]
Of course. If they were to kill me instead, it'd be worthwhile. I'd want to feel that love until my very final moment.
Personally, I think the permanence itself means something. We're all running on borrowed time, man...why shouldn't we try and make the end as beautiful as we can?
[ The look on his face is...probably more excited than it should be? Although the edges of his soften, in some indescribable way at the question. ]
I wonder if there's a better way to die? [ Of this, he is certain. Because isn't love the end-all? ] But I had a choice, that's how I'd want to go. Feeling my heart beat fast and then slow down until it stops....aaah, just the thought makes me shiver...!!
The fact it's the end is what makes it so pleasurable, you know? I'm not saying I'd like to jump right into a relationship and go at it off the bat...you need the buildup. The perfect bloodlust doesn't just develop overnight.
Right. Because "having desires" narrows it down so much, doesn't it? I can't say I care too much for the God that the Church likes to yap about all the time, but aren't they also the kind of god who thinks all 'sins' are equal in their eyes, depending on who you ask?
So sneaking an extra piece of delicious cake is just as bad as murder, apparently.
Can't say I'm too familiar with church as a whole; religion's not really a big thing back in the complex. [ Besides the uh...obvious, anyway. ] And I'm guessing the one God I have heard about before here probably isn't the same one putting us on stage...but that does sound like a pretty loose criteria.
Not that I'm not guilty of quite a few sins myself...but this seems like a pretty ineffective way to judge people for them. [ He leans back, absentmindedly ticking off his fingers as he speaks. ] Is murdering another for your wish not a sin, or do they consider killing another sinner a way to cleanse yourself of the act itself? And so on.
From the sounds of what our dear Dramaturge was saying, I really think it's as simple as 'as long as you're doing it for and with genuine love for God in your heart of hearts, it's okay.' Or at least that's the intent.
[ So, you know, maybe the point is to make them let God into their hearts or something in hopes that it'll automatically absolve them of whatever they do. Or something.
Honestly she kind of wonders what certain saints and zealots might make of this place. Oh well. Not her circus. "Wholesome" and "positive" feelings about murder— what a joke. Even she knows that taking joy in the ending of life can only be considered evil, and he's not even talking about the thrill of the hunt, chasing down and toying with prey to boot. ]
Talk about an abusable escape clause. No wonder human society is such a mess.
I'm all for doing things for love, but I can't say I feel anything too strong for God. Demanding someone's love without really working for it is just tasteless...
[ Either way, he doesn't really care much about being absolved of sins. Sure, he doesn't like being accused as much as the next guy, but he's got no interest in offering up love and respect to someone who'd try to wipe his hands clean.
For those moments without love, without passionate intent, it's just mechanical. A job to do, a task to complete. He's not going to up and pretend he's an upstanding member of society just because God says he's faithful enough to have the slate wiped clean, or something.
...Really. It just leaves a bad taste in his mouth. ]
That type of half-assed excuse is really the worst.
Oh, I agree with you. That's the kind of God this is, though. Humans have killed so many of their own kind over the years, claiming that it was for God's sake, believing that it justifies them and their cause.
[ They try to dress it up to be anything other than slaughter, to deny that they're simply just bloodthirsty, and for what? ]
I suppose they must have been right, if this is how their God really is.
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[ Pointed nails drum on the countertop. ]
You think so? Contracts are rigid in my line of work...but I don't remember agreeing to this one, personally. I hate to admit that gets under my skin a little, and not in the fun way.
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[Not that he knows anything about gods.]
Mm. You...too? I feel like I have little choice in mine...
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[ Something twitches and pulls at the corner of his mind, lips pursing tight. God, huh.... ]
I don't really like making them, usually. I'm not too fond of the work I do, so they're usually distasteful. Me and the family business don't really mesh well....at least on the moral code side of things, y'know?
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[But, you know. Everything feels off. Maybe that's just his anxiety, though.]
The family business? Which is...what?
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Assassination, actually. [ You know, said as casually as if he was into computer science or something. ] Contracts are pretty much the whole business.
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I see. But you said something about...going against the family?
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Right, that....taking lives for money is just vulgar, you know? Murder should be intimate and passionate, full of love and joy. Makes me not exactly perfect killing machine material.
[ The gaze shifts, an unreadable look in his eyes, although his lips twinge in bitterness. ]
...Which is why this place is pretty disgusting to me. The meaning loses it's weight when you push someone to kill for greed and desperation.
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[That's...sure a take.]
I've never heard murder described that way. [He's talking about it like he's talking about the weather.] So you feel it should be a special experience...?
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[ Is this the type of thing they should be discussing after all that? God only knows, and he is closing his ears. ]
The only thing better is a mutual bloodlust...wanting to kill each other in a fervent moment of passion is the height of love.
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[Hundreds can die in a single moment, and that's it.]
So it's not about people, but...you, too, want to die in a special way.
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[ Soft, and easy-breakable. And yet people persevere all the same, something to be admired. ]
Of course. If they were to kill me instead, it'd be worthwhile. I'd want to feel that love until my very final moment.
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[The universe will end, too.]
Love...but you would die for it?
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[ The look on his face is...probably more excited than it should be? Although the edges of his soften, in some indescribable way at the question. ]
I wonder if there's a better way to die? [ Of this, he is certain. Because isn't love the end-all? ] But I had a choice, that's how I'd want to go. Feeling my heart beat fast and then slow down until it stops....aaah, just the thought makes me shiver...!!
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[He must be something like a hedonist, he thinks. Something about chasing pleasure through death.]
Wouldn't you want to enjoy that pleasure and then not die...? People are so confusing....
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The fact it's the end is what makes it so pleasurable, you know? I'm not saying I'd like to jump right into a relationship and go at it off the bat...you need the buildup. The perfect bloodlust doesn't just develop overnight.
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[why can't you just have *** like most people!!!]
Is it not exciting enough?
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[ Like, why are you enabling him. ]
Do you really want to know what excites me...? I don't mind, but doing it in front of everyone might be embarrassing...
[ He says, absolutely looking poised to do it- ]
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CW GORE I GUESS???
crying
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Contracts are something I am quite familiar with too, and I can certainly say I don't recall either agreeing to or making one here.
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[ All of them, bamboozled... ]
Part of me is curious what makes the cut for the selection.
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So sneaking an extra piece of delicious cake is just as bad as murder, apparently.
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Not that I'm not guilty of quite a few sins myself...but this seems like a pretty ineffective way to judge people for them. [ He leans back, absentmindedly ticking off his fingers as he speaks. ] Is murdering another for your wish not a sin, or do they consider killing another sinner a way to cleanse yourself of the act itself? And so on.
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[ So, you know, maybe the point is to make them let God into their hearts or something in hopes that it'll automatically absolve them of whatever they do. Or something.
Honestly she kind of wonders what certain saints and zealots might make of this place. Oh well. Not her circus. "Wholesome" and "positive" feelings about murder— what a joke. Even she knows that taking joy in the ending of life can only be considered evil, and he's not even talking about the thrill of the hunt, chasing down and toying with prey to boot. ]
Talk about an abusable escape clause. No wonder human society is such a mess.
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[ Either way, he doesn't really care much about being absolved of sins. Sure, he doesn't like being accused as much as the next guy, but he's got no interest in offering up love and respect to someone who'd try to wipe his hands clean.
For those moments without love, without passionate intent, it's just mechanical. A job to do, a task to complete. He's not going to up and pretend he's an upstanding member of society just because God says he's faithful enough to have the slate wiped clean, or something.
...Really. It just leaves a bad taste in his mouth. ]
That type of half-assed excuse is really the worst.
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[ They try to dress it up to be anything other than slaughter, to deny that they're simply just bloodthirsty, and for what? ]
I suppose they must have been right, if this is how their God really is.